As a former too long unemployed husband I can tell you what motivated me to get a job. The wife said, "I am not leaving you, I promised for better or worse, and you haven't see worse yet". I took the first position offered, which I am highly overqualified for because I have no interest in finding out how much worse it can get being married to a redhead. At some point, I will be motivated to look for something which pays more but at the moment I am happy with the work I do and it is totally out of my experience and gender. I work at a florist shop, doing grunt work, deliveries and menial tasks for which I am paid not terribly less than the hourly rate I made when paid salary given that I was expected to work 15-20 hours overtime each week for that salary.
With Valentines day coming up, I may even have to dig through the reject flowers and put together an arrangement for the wife and present it with a lisp. "Happy Valentineth Day Thweetheart". That should make her worry.
re: the mood swing - my best guess, as a non-medical professional, with no scientific education beyond high school chemistry class, is that vaping-quitting you mentioned. I quit smoking cold-turkey some years ago; after 2 'meh' days, went 42 or more sleepless hours, and became earnestly interested in where and how to begin my murder spree. (I am not normally a very excitable or violent person). Nicotine is a VERY powerful drug.
Feb 9, 2023·edited Feb 9, 2023Liked by Guttermouth
right, haven't finished the article yet but i gotta jump on the diet and mood swings
with keto, especially if it isnt your first attempt will go slow, any weight you lost so far is water retention. it will take at least 6 weeks for your body to settle down, it will have to get rid of the inflammation and only then think about working on fat loss.
the mood issues are a symptom of keto, your gut bacteria talk continuously and instantaneously with your brain and the ones that feed off carbs and sugars are pissed off and dying. you mood will get more stable and should lift in the coming weeks x
someone mentioned iodine in the comments, do you eat fish? if not i'd recommend detoxadine rather than lugols based on my research
After the devil comes to claim Fauci, do you think the Covidians will gather at his burial site like disaffected youths at Jim Morrison's grave in Pere Lachaise?
I don’t recall how I came upon your Substack, however, I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your life stories each week! The music video was also great! 😊
Your scary night episode sounds like my thyroid issues. Mine went hyper a year ago for a few months and thyroid tests at first were normal so allopathic docs were clueless. They suggested ablation.
My naturopath got me on Lugol's Iodine and life is much better. Can i just say that menopause is a bitch?
That wobblyness you described sounds awfully familiar. I've had similar episodes when I was still teaching - continously heightened negative stress* over time was the cause according to the whitecoats. You want to watch that, and find a constructive release - like building a fence maybe.
Am very jealous of your animal farm (why is it called animal husbandry in english?), would love to be able to afford beehives, piggie wiggies and goats. Will probably have to lop a couple of heads off roosters come summer - up until now it's worked out to have several in the same enclosure but the other day we found one so badly pecked he's currently recuperating in a cardboard box in the wife's sewing room (aka the room I do not enter**). One of the new ones, some kind of Road Runner-lookalike breed, is growing fiercely territorial, so he's for the block to if he doesn't mend his ways - he won't mount the hens, he won't keep order, all he does is eat and shit and crow.
At night when the moon is out.
Haven't experienced a meth high myself, but acid used to make everything move in total slo-mo, as if the world was set in pine resin and I could move like lightning. Which is cool until you try to walk down a set of stairs which turns out to be an escalator in the subway, said escalator starting to move when you walk on it. According to my friends, I looked like I was doing John Cleese's "silly walks"-routine on the escalator. In skintight black stretch-jeans, size 13 Get-a-Grip boots halfway up to the knees, a mustard coloured "wife-beater" shirt, and a foot and a half mohawk hairdo.
If I was the praying kind, I'd give thanks daily for cameraphones not existing back then.
Anyways, speaking as one man about/to another, not finding a paying job makes one feel less like a Man. That can become self-loathing (speaking from personal experience). Only way to combat that I ever found - excepting chemicals- was getting off my bee-hind and getting on wth things, even if it was piddling stuff like replanting all the houseplants.
Don't know if that would help Husbandmouth, but trying to dredge up feeling some pride and joy in doing daily chores goes along way for me, and I'd rather do that than go on bloody pills or something.
Okay, Jiminy Cricket-moment over.
*Negative stress was explained to me as stress you feel when you are unable to affect events/surroundings/circumstances or perceives a lack of being unable to. It quickly becomes self-fulfilling and a self-referential reinforcement spiral. (Guessing you know this stuff already but some things needs saying anyway. Of course, feel free to tell me to step off if you feel I'm being to much of a knowitall busybody!)
**Because we have different definitions of Order. Hers is that it's order if /she/ knows where everything is; mine is that it is order if you could drop a space alien in there and it'd immediately understand where everything is and how it's organised.
I long for Spring. We have a foot of icy snow, frozen so solid I had to use the chainsaw the other day to clear the steps on the porch. The yard is covered in 5" of solid ice. F*cking Greta, I'd like to give her a chisel and make her clear the yard of ice, global warming my hoary hairy buttocks mumble grumble.
Great song! I'm a big fan of surf instrumentals. Fun fact: Jimi Hendrix was a fan of Dick Dale, whom he thought was dying at the time he wrote a reference to "surf music" in Third Stone from the Sun.
I am just a lawyer, and have no medical education, but with your diet change, the "episode" you experienced has some of the hallmarks of hypoglycemia. The optimist side of me that I keep carefully hidden would say it was transitory as your metabolism adjusts to a new normal.
Thank you for the music. I grew up on the beach in Southern California and well remember those days and the music. I am embarrassed to say that the first 45 I ever bought was the Monkees!
As a former too long unemployed husband I can tell you what motivated me to get a job. The wife said, "I am not leaving you, I promised for better or worse, and you haven't see worse yet". I took the first position offered, which I am highly overqualified for because I have no interest in finding out how much worse it can get being married to a redhead. At some point, I will be motivated to look for something which pays more but at the moment I am happy with the work I do and it is totally out of my experience and gender. I work at a florist shop, doing grunt work, deliveries and menial tasks for which I am paid not terribly less than the hourly rate I made when paid salary given that I was expected to work 15-20 hours overtime each week for that salary.
With Valentines day coming up, I may even have to dig through the reject flowers and put together an arrangement for the wife and present it with a lisp. "Happy Valentineth Day Thweetheart". That should make her worry.
For the Fauci grave party, can I lead the Shitting Contingent?
re: the mood swing - my best guess, as a non-medical professional, with no scientific education beyond high school chemistry class, is that vaping-quitting you mentioned. I quit smoking cold-turkey some years ago; after 2 'meh' days, went 42 or more sleepless hours, and became earnestly interested in where and how to begin my murder spree. (I am not normally a very excitable or violent person). Nicotine is a VERY powerful drug.
Good friends saved the day, as they so often do.
BTW GM, how would you know what a 'meth high' felt like? Asking for a friend.
right, haven't finished the article yet but i gotta jump on the diet and mood swings
with keto, especially if it isnt your first attempt will go slow, any weight you lost so far is water retention. it will take at least 6 weeks for your body to settle down, it will have to get rid of the inflammation and only then think about working on fat loss.
the mood issues are a symptom of keto, your gut bacteria talk continuously and instantaneously with your brain and the ones that feed off carbs and sugars are pissed off and dying. you mood will get more stable and should lift in the coming weeks x
someone mentioned iodine in the comments, do you eat fish? if not i'd recommend detoxadine rather than lugols based on my research
After the devil comes to claim Fauci, do you think the Covidians will gather at his burial site like disaffected youths at Jim Morrison's grave in Pere Lachaise?
Curious, and don't mean you to get riled up, but why can't Husbandmouth get a job with ups or something while still looking for a job?
Great job with the farm, I'm envious. I'm going to try a small vegetable garden this year.
For your weird sickness, check out NAC. Up your vitamin D3 and C. Maybe some zinc too. Blessings.
I don’t recall how I came upon your Substack, however, I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your life stories each week! The music video was also great! 😊
How did the surgery go? I've had friends with ACL surgeries--and heard mixed outcomes.
Your scary night episode sounds like my thyroid issues. Mine went hyper a year ago for a few months and thyroid tests at first were normal so allopathic docs were clueless. They suggested ablation.
My naturopath got me on Lugol's Iodine and life is much better. Can i just say that menopause is a bitch?
Misread it as "smurfrock".
That wobblyness you described sounds awfully familiar. I've had similar episodes when I was still teaching - continously heightened negative stress* over time was the cause according to the whitecoats. You want to watch that, and find a constructive release - like building a fence maybe.
Am very jealous of your animal farm (why is it called animal husbandry in english?), would love to be able to afford beehives, piggie wiggies and goats. Will probably have to lop a couple of heads off roosters come summer - up until now it's worked out to have several in the same enclosure but the other day we found one so badly pecked he's currently recuperating in a cardboard box in the wife's sewing room (aka the room I do not enter**). One of the new ones, some kind of Road Runner-lookalike breed, is growing fiercely territorial, so he's for the block to if he doesn't mend his ways - he won't mount the hens, he won't keep order, all he does is eat and shit and crow.
At night when the moon is out.
Haven't experienced a meth high myself, but acid used to make everything move in total slo-mo, as if the world was set in pine resin and I could move like lightning. Which is cool until you try to walk down a set of stairs which turns out to be an escalator in the subway, said escalator starting to move when you walk on it. According to my friends, I looked like I was doing John Cleese's "silly walks"-routine on the escalator. In skintight black stretch-jeans, size 13 Get-a-Grip boots halfway up to the knees, a mustard coloured "wife-beater" shirt, and a foot and a half mohawk hairdo.
If I was the praying kind, I'd give thanks daily for cameraphones not existing back then.
Anyways, speaking as one man about/to another, not finding a paying job makes one feel less like a Man. That can become self-loathing (speaking from personal experience). Only way to combat that I ever found - excepting chemicals- was getting off my bee-hind and getting on wth things, even if it was piddling stuff like replanting all the houseplants.
Don't know if that would help Husbandmouth, but trying to dredge up feeling some pride and joy in doing daily chores goes along way for me, and I'd rather do that than go on bloody pills or something.
Okay, Jiminy Cricket-moment over.
*Negative stress was explained to me as stress you feel when you are unable to affect events/surroundings/circumstances or perceives a lack of being unable to. It quickly becomes self-fulfilling and a self-referential reinforcement spiral. (Guessing you know this stuff already but some things needs saying anyway. Of course, feel free to tell me to step off if you feel I'm being to much of a knowitall busybody!)
**Because we have different definitions of Order. Hers is that it's order if /she/ knows where everything is; mine is that it is order if you could drop a space alien in there and it'd immediately understand where everything is and how it's organised.
I long for Spring. We have a foot of icy snow, frozen so solid I had to use the chainsaw the other day to clear the steps on the porch. The yard is covered in 5" of solid ice. F*cking Greta, I'd like to give her a chisel and make her clear the yard of ice, global warming my hoary hairy buttocks mumble grumble.
I am addicted to vaping. It sucks. I have quit 2 times for over 2 years in both cases. But as soon as I had one hit I was back at it
Hang in G. Just remind yourself every second that goes by is the effect of less addiction
Do the Sufrajettes do an instrumental of the Wings song "Jet?"
Great song! I'm a big fan of surf instrumentals. Fun fact: Jimi Hendrix was a fan of Dick Dale, whom he thought was dying at the time he wrote a reference to "surf music" in Third Stone from the Sun.
I am just a lawyer, and have no medical education, but with your diet change, the "episode" you experienced has some of the hallmarks of hypoglycemia. The optimist side of me that I keep carefully hidden would say it was transitory as your metabolism adjusts to a new normal.
Thank you for the music. I grew up on the beach in Southern California and well remember those days and the music. I am embarrassed to say that the first 45 I ever bought was the Monkees!
Maybe a reference to Bowie's Sufferjett City.
My mind wanders now and then."Wham bam, thank you ma'ma"😎