What a treat of a read! You didn’t belabor anything but touched on everything!! I was highly entertained by your writing style, and I so relate to the losing and making new friends thing. If they don’t think like me, they aren’t even a candidate (my words). How could they be if we don’t share the same values? Makes it simple. I am so sorry for your low ebb, but I’m glad you’re popping your head up now!
The making and losing friends thing is something a huge number of us have gone through in the past two years; a social upheaval that normally only happens at particular junctures in our lives (entering/finishing college, getting married, moving, etc.). I had a stable, close-knit group of friends for a good many years at that point and wasn't planning on shedding any of them, let alone most of them, anytime soon.
Someone on reddit called it, and the recent migration of so many people to/from various places in the country based on politics, the 'Great Sorting.' Here's a depressing thought, though: for those of us who lost many friends and family for being 'dissidents' in these past few years, many of us have (hopefully) made some new ones as we find likeminded people in places like this- but do we really imagine that our former friends have done the same? Do you imagine some huge love-in happening on the other side of the aisle along the lines of "wow, you love masks and the WEF too? BFF!"
In my case, what I’m feeling most of the time, even on my better days, is GRIEF.
The depth of loss is indescribable, and fortunately, I doubt i even need to start in on it. Everything I thought I knew was a lie. The world is a malevolent place. Nothing will ever feel light or safe again. The country of my birth has gone.
Oh, and they really do intend to kill most of us, quite a lot more quickly than dying of old age would have had it.
I can't believe this is coming from me, but here's a more optimistic way to look at it.
Everything you thought you knew was a lie- okay, I can accept that.
The world is a malevolent place- yep, I can accept that.
But, by your own admission, it was those things already, and always was. But you were happy, and productive, and successful a lot of the time.
So, is the hard truth that the illusion made this possible? If so, THAT's the part you, as a person who has achieved a level of success and knowledge that a miniscule fraction of humanity has, present company included, need to conquer: not the fact that Midgard is an uncaring place, but that you now have to construct happiness and success without illusions.
Recovered drug addicts manage this (to construct a meaningful existence after a pleasant illusion is destroyed). Many don't. You're better equipped than most.
You're grieving, so grieve. Grief is part of the process. Actually do the process: say your goodbyes and reflect on what was lost.
But grieve actively. Don't, as discussed lower down in the thread, "tread water."
The piece not addressed (& you might simply disagree) isn’t just loss of innocence, but the realisation that elites intend to enslave & likely kill most of us.
Unless I find reasons not to believe that or it’s somehow thwarted, there’s no happiness in denial.
That realisation is the worst part. It’s not about me. I’ve never worried about dying & im not concerned about it now,
I am concerned that my young adult kids & their baby sons don’t have a prospect. That’s a bitter pill. I’d do anything & willingly die if it might make a difference, we’re they to have a chance to compete & have a normal up & down life.
They are each aware of my reasoning, but I don’t know exactly how this impacts them.
I think there's always been a threat that elites intend to enslave or kill most of their population. We've simply lived in an anomalous period of history. The scope and possibility of it today is simply bigger and deeper because of technology.
You say your kids are aware of your thoughts and feelings on this; what are theirs?
Honestly? Most of the time, they’re in total denial. They occasionally ask me about normal things like pension investments. Pensions at their age make sense only if they think the next 50-60 years are expected to be largely similar to today, or better.
As an female owner of Korean martial arts school( going under in the faltering economy), who seems to probably has Viking genes from her Native American blood... I'm acutely interested in what Viking martial arts training might entail.
Then again... as a aging believer in the coming ice age/magnetic reversal/fucktard elite hosing-over?? I'm not sure how much energy I'd have to follow up on said interest.
I'd say if you have the energy for anything physically strenuous, you have the energy for a martial art.
I got my ass whipped in kendo by an 90-year old (doing nitto-ryu, no less) in Japan years ago.
As to the Viking fighting, it's an interesting and very niche group I've discovered. HEMA is not a new sport and has a broad and eclectic set of historical doctrines it draws from. This group is interesting because, as has often been said, we know very little specific, concrete information about many things the Vikings did, as much of their history was rewritten by the incoming Christian culture, and what little remained was largely oral. We mainly have the Sagas and archaeology to go on to draw any real conclusions.
So the style was largely developed from these sources- study of the wound patterns of bodies known to have fallen in combat with Vikings (or Vikings fighting with each other), and deep reads of descriptions of battle in the Sagas as far as how someone held or utilized their weapons (we know, for example, that shields were used quite differently than mainland Europeans did several centuries later, etc.). Currently, we train with spear (two-handed), sword and shield, axe and shield, and seax. The founder would like to begin introducing aspects of Glima, the Viking unarmed style, as well, but currently the doctrine focuses on armed fighting.
Butting in again: a thing to consider regarding viking style fighting: battle, holmgång and a regular fight was very different things. (Yeah I now you know but it needs saying.)
Battle, well, then you are shoulder to shoulder with your chums in the scrum - hard to replicate in a safe and OHSA-approved manner.
Holmgång had rules - first blood, surrender and death. To violate any of them meant you would be declared wolf (not only outlaw but peaceless too).
Regular fights didn't have rules, unless it was an assault. A fight which both parties was equally guilty of starting was not counted as assault. There's an ancient idiom covering that: Han som sig i leken ger, ska leken tåla. He who enters the fray/game/fight, shall suffer it too.
One of the best sources on viking era laws are Gutalagen - law of the Gut (goths). It's the pre-christian laws of Gotland. When they became christian, they just added an extra "chapter zero" as a preamble to the actual laws. The actual first law states that all children are to be cared for, they may not be ut out. Haven't the foggiest where to find a translation if one even exists.
Yeah, our 11th century laws are the viking era laws plus Jesus written down. They're made up out of tingsmen's notes. Some of the detail the exact fine for exactly how much of a finger someone lost in a fight, if the bone was showing, how many shards of bone and how far from the boy they flew and so on - all to adjust the sum to be paid.
Braining someone so the actual brain could be seen was more expensive than outright killing him.
This is a big deal for our understanding of western European/New World culture when you consider how many things "English common law" is the basis for.
I am sorry. I feel your pain. I see all the closed schools all over the Portland area.
I was lucky enough to sell my practice when the mandates kicked in for health care workers. I didn't trust our state board to not allow exemptions. I was unemployed for 8 months. Managed to get myself to apply and landed a full time job with another doc, just 2 miles from my house. It was hard to work. I mean, what the hell for? What good is it? What good is the money I have saved? What will our future look like?
I was once a Korean martial arts school owner too. I left it and the ex who couldn't keep it in his pants, a long time ago. I miss it very much. I long for a tight group to workout with who are not part of the fucktards.
I struggle with the "what is it all for?" question constantly. It has helped a great deal to move to a home where our constant ongoing project is to achieve self-sufficiency, but even then, the question "but why even?" still pops up. It's why I hope Husbandmouth and I can get back onto the adoption process as I feel that continuity is one of the few things in life that is its own purpose.
But I have always been served well by one thing: if you have no other purpose in life, survive. If nothing else is happening, make survival your purpose. When nothing feels possible (whether or not that's true), your job is to make sure you're around for when possibility returns.
What good is it? We of martial discipline ( Hapki!) are the rock others may cling to. I have long told my students that " I don't train Fighters... I train The Light others will flock to in times of need"
You work to make the money to survive what's coming,my compatriot. You work to lift others above the tide of filth and degradation of duality they want to plunge our heads under.
You work to better yourself and those around you by your example. You ditched that dickhead because he wasn't Worthy of your light!
If needs be, flee the Portland area for a place ,perhaps away from the Cascadian fault lol, that you can find that tight group. That community.
In NE rural Georgia...we're not many...but we've read the tarot cards and they say:
" These fuckers are trying to run the board on the human race... we will not acquiesce to their goals"
Damn I appreciate that I can mouth-off freely here... lol
Love your “the Light others will flock to in time of need” thought. We all need that hope that our purpose is a noble one. I’m going with this premise from now on when I question my sanity and reason for being. Otherwise, I’ll be out in the streets at some point sending the fuckers to another dimension.
Please do- understand there is No One Way,and try to seevthrough the fog. Let them flock,be their examplar, then send them out in ever ranging circles. There is a time and place for everything. Do whatever you can to lift your own Beingness,before we get to the point where you start sending. A conscience must be clear that the actions were necessary.
We must maintain humanity,or it's not going to be a place we want hand down.
I'm more likely to take a chunk outta your ass,but encouraging foot placement is also within my bulwark *evil grin*
You're in Healthcare ( what? No matter... even a coding specialist should be learning something that makes them valuable) and you're willing to draw on martial experience. You're willing to re-engage with others to recharge your experience.
You are an asset!
Me? I'm an ass,but one who deserves respect.
( here is where a " Yes,Ma'am!" would be appropriate)
Find your Place, AmKing. Find your Location. Find your peeps,even if it means moving to do so. You've skills...put them to use for You and Yours. Make sure that in the future ,Yours is a encompassing mantra.
I know this isn't an original thought, but I'm pretty sure- beyond joking- that she is actively drunk 99% of the time I see her on camera. I'm fairly sure there's some dementia starting to creep in, too.
As to the kind of person she is, I think she's been this way for a long, long time.
Writing when you get depressed becomes one of those "email you haven't answered in a month" or "you should have called your mom" things where the longer it goes, the more impossible it feels.
The existence of the handful of paid subscribers were finally the impetus of "you owe it to some people to get off your ass" and at least lay down some tracks.
as a life long sufferer of depression i understand and offer the only thing that truly helped me, and that was going on a keto diet. it changes the gut bacteria and makes them happier, when they are happy they tell your brain to cheer up. it really works
It's tough because I do all the cooking for the family, and the guys are absolutely not interested in doing diets of any kind. The social aspect of food always makes diet tricky.
what i do is go full carnivore, i just eat the meat, fish, eggs and cheese. add some full fat cream to my coffee etc. my appetite suppresses and i can quickly reach the point where others food choices disgust me
That's the part I have to get to. I've had great results with keto before, I just have to get over the initial hump. The insomnia is seriously fucking up my appetite, though, so that has to get licked first, and I'm planning on quitting vapes when my current bottle is done. I know I can only disrupt my patterns so much at once.
yea motivation is tough when u dont give a fuck. i been meaning to get back into keto for a while, maybe we can motivate each other. reduce the crap food slowly daily/weekly a little less
Lots of small dishes maybe? Sort of smörgåsbord so people can pick and mix. Worked well when the wife and I lived in a collective and some were finnicky with their food. Don't want the honey-gazed chicken that's been marinating in ginger jucie over night? More for me! (cue all the man-boys round the table clamourng for getting the largest share left) Here, you can have my portion of the veggie casserole!
That kind of thing. 'Course, one needs the time to do the cooking. It's always logistics, isn't it?
Oh my dear GM, I realized this evening while reading your post how much I love your Substack/you. Even though funds are tight right now - as hubs and I prepare for the great famine and end of times die-off - I went ahead with an annual subscription. I figure that we’ll be able to enjoy the work of an excellent story-teller while we’re wasting away from starvation and radiation sickness.
Will be checking out the Canik Rival ASAP. Hubs thinks we need to expand the arsenal to protect homestead and our crazy, whiny, wimpy, pacifist liberal neighbors when the Chinese make land.
My 2 cent advice on "the homestead arsenal." There's actually been a flurry of small arms evolution in the private sector in the past few years, and I've gotten to try things that have made me rethink some of my doctrine on what's worth buying for what purpose. Hopefully some of this is useful:
1) For straight, indoor, 'home invasion' defense, a .22 carbine like the Blue Line Global GSG. Yes, I'm serious. After playing with a few of these and seeing them perform, I'm a convert to .22 platforms for a couple reasons. They're light and accurate and the bullpup makes them intuitive for infrequent shooters (i.e., you can get pretty good with them pretty fast). The .22 round makes it very unlikely that through-and-through shots will hurt kids or pets and is less likely to shred your house. The round is very accurate at the range you're engaging a home invader. They're also VERY affordable, as is the ammo (not to mention .22 is abundant and available even right now). They have high-capacity magazines, which is what makes the .22 round workable for this role: you're not putting 1 shot in someone with a Ruger 10/22, you're rapidly striking the head and upper torso with probably more than 10 rounds, which will absolutely be lethal or incapacitating. The light weight makes them good for young shooters, too.
2) for civilian "shit hits the fan" homestead defense:
a) a tactical 12-gauge if you can handle the weight and recoil. Autoloaders have much better recoil than most pumps. Keep both slugs and shot on hand.
b) an AR platform you've handled and is comfortable. .223 ammo is more common, cheaper, and would be more available in a "battlefield scavenge" scenario, but .300 Blackout is a better round for the AR and most ARs these days offer platforms in both calibers.
c) another rifle in 7.62x39 like an AK-series. There are modern "AKAR" guns with AR uppers and AK lowers that let you enjoy the handling of AR rifles (and mount AR accessories) while shooting 7.62 and being able to use AK clips (depending on what you buy). These guns are heavier, as is the round and recoil, but 7.62 is widely available and is a very hard hitter (you're more likely to put someone down with one round than with a .223/5.56). The size and power also make a 7.62 rifle good as a dual-purpose for hunting game (I've used mine for deer/boar hunting for years).
d) pistols in 9mm or .40 cal. These are abundantly available and affordable calibers, allow for high-capacity magazines, and produce extremely manageable recoil even for people that aren't very strong or have lots of hours shooting. They require a lot of practice to be effective- shot placement matters a lot with smaller rounds like this.
If you've got one of each of those (maybe pistols for everyone), you're really as prepared as you can be.
But another big consideration for a real SHTF situation, especially for home, static, family defense, is body armor. It's completely legal for anyone without a felony conviction, anywhere in the US, to purchase body armor! Level 4, the highest grade, can (emphasis on CAN) stop assault rifle rounds. There are civilian retailers that sell vests/suits and plates (the things you slide into the clothing that actually do the protecting) at all levels, with designs for different body sizes, women's torsos, and kids. Body armor is expensive- level 4 sets can be over $500, and you have to replace the plates if they're ever hit- but they can save your life, and for families, they're a "one and done" purchase. Infidel Body Armor is a family-friendly brand.
You are missed. Reading your words are a bulwark to wanting to smother the living shit out of some folks. In some way, I suspect many of us feel we’ve been treading water for the last two years. Congrats on the new armament! Nothing like the feel of steel and the sound of pew pew pew.
We HAVE been treading water, and I think that's a big part of why so many of us feel so sick, tired, and resigned. Humans aren't designed to exist in hypervigilant, hyperaroused states for very long. It grinds us down hard.
At the same time, what the good fuck does 'moving on' feel like? Right now, it would feel like surrender. But what else are we waiting for?
They have fucked us up good, and they know it: it makes and keeps us off-balance, suggestible, and not thinking clearly.
The way forward needs to be some kind of reflection- on a very personal level- of "what can I realistically do as an individual," and then giving ourselves permission to enjoy life around that. This is made harder by the fact that many of us are REBUILDING lives to at least some extent at the same time.
But we have to believe in a future. We don't have to have faith that "everything will be okay," but we have to want to be here tomorrow.
Post when you post. These days, I am just glad that folks I follow are keeping on.
I read your take on Rachel and the DC Juggalos to the fam whilst on the road. They're in agreement but not happy about it. Truly hope you are mistaken.
I hope I am too, but the weird thing is, with this and all the other Big Things... I'm gradually getting to the point where I almost don't care HOW it turns out, I just want to KNOW, you know? Just cut the foreplay.
I really enjoy your Molly Bloom-style train of consciousness.
Tiw, mumble grumble bloomin' joormans not being able to pronounce it right mumble grumble. Ah well, being lefthanded just like him makes me biased anyway. As I'm sure you know, Tyr put his right arm in the jaws of Fenris as security when putting the chain Gleipner on him, and when the chain choked him, Fenris bit the arm right off. There's a moral in there somewhere...
Depression sucks. I know that beast well, it put me in a bottle for four years straight, and if not for meeting my wife it'd have put me in the grave. But you know how to beat it.
Roe roe roe your wade... our media are having conniptions and joyful hysterics about it. Apparently according to pundits in state media, A handmaid's Tale is a documentary about present day US. And for this I must pay tax? I mean, as I understand US liberals and whatnots think we here in Europe have unlimited and unregulated abortions? Well, about that: week 12, that's pretty much it here. Later than that and you need to get it approved for medical reasons.
Viking martial arts? Must be glima.
Leather anniversary... if ever there was a term ledning itself to innuendo!
And that bit about Albuquerque and Rachel and so on had me guffawing for real - I could somehow see the whole scene in the mind's theater.
That bit with having trouble keeping female friends, that's virtually ubiquitous for all strong women with backbone, grit and integrity. That's no flaw or anything like that - it's the opposite!
What a treat of a read! You didn’t belabor anything but touched on everything!! I was highly entertained by your writing style, and I so relate to the losing and making new friends thing. If they don’t think like me, they aren’t even a candidate (my words). How could they be if we don’t share the same values? Makes it simple. I am so sorry for your low ebb, but I’m glad you’re popping your head up now!
The making and losing friends thing is something a huge number of us have gone through in the past two years; a social upheaval that normally only happens at particular junctures in our lives (entering/finishing college, getting married, moving, etc.). I had a stable, close-knit group of friends for a good many years at that point and wasn't planning on shedding any of them, let alone most of them, anytime soon.
Someone on reddit called it, and the recent migration of so many people to/from various places in the country based on politics, the 'Great Sorting.' Here's a depressing thought, though: for those of us who lost many friends and family for being 'dissidents' in these past few years, many of us have (hopefully) made some new ones as we find likeminded people in places like this- but do we really imagine that our former friends have done the same? Do you imagine some huge love-in happening on the other side of the aisle along the lines of "wow, you love masks and the WEF too? BFF!"
In my case, what I’m feeling most of the time, even on my better days, is GRIEF.
The depth of loss is indescribable, and fortunately, I doubt i even need to start in on it. Everything I thought I knew was a lie. The world is a malevolent place. Nothing will ever feel light or safe again. The country of my birth has gone.
Oh, and they really do intend to kill most of us, quite a lot more quickly than dying of old age would have had it.
Other than this, everything’s good.
I can't believe this is coming from me, but here's a more optimistic way to look at it.
Everything you thought you knew was a lie- okay, I can accept that.
The world is a malevolent place- yep, I can accept that.
But, by your own admission, it was those things already, and always was. But you were happy, and productive, and successful a lot of the time.
So, is the hard truth that the illusion made this possible? If so, THAT's the part you, as a person who has achieved a level of success and knowledge that a miniscule fraction of humanity has, present company included, need to conquer: not the fact that Midgard is an uncaring place, but that you now have to construct happiness and success without illusions.
Recovered drug addicts manage this (to construct a meaningful existence after a pleasant illusion is destroyed). Many don't. You're better equipped than most.
You're grieving, so grieve. Grief is part of the process. Actually do the process: say your goodbyes and reflect on what was lost.
But grieve actively. Don't, as discussed lower down in the thread, "tread water."
Thank you, it means a lot.
The piece not addressed (& you might simply disagree) isn’t just loss of innocence, but the realisation that elites intend to enslave & likely kill most of us.
Unless I find reasons not to believe that or it’s somehow thwarted, there’s no happiness in denial.
That realisation is the worst part. It’s not about me. I’ve never worried about dying & im not concerned about it now,
I am concerned that my young adult kids & their baby sons don’t have a prospect. That’s a bitter pill. I’d do anything & willingly die if it might make a difference, we’re they to have a chance to compete & have a normal up & down life.
They are each aware of my reasoning, but I don’t know exactly how this impacts them.
I think there's always been a threat that elites intend to enslave or kill most of their population. We've simply lived in an anomalous period of history. The scope and possibility of it today is simply bigger and deeper because of technology.
You say your kids are aware of your thoughts and feelings on this; what are theirs?
Honestly? Most of the time, they’re in total denial. They occasionally ask me about normal things like pension investments. Pensions at their age make sense only if they think the next 50-60 years are expected to be largely similar to today, or better.
Will review this week.
You have been missed.
But then I got married and I was missused. :)
I'm glad you are back on your feet and fighting. I will have to look up Viking martial arts.
As an female owner of Korean martial arts school( going under in the faltering economy), who seems to probably has Viking genes from her Native American blood... I'm acutely interested in what Viking martial arts training might entail.
Then again... as a aging believer in the coming ice age/magnetic reversal/fucktard elite hosing-over?? I'm not sure how much energy I'd have to follow up on said interest.
*sigh*
I'd say if you have the energy for anything physically strenuous, you have the energy for a martial art.
I got my ass whipped in kendo by an 90-year old (doing nitto-ryu, no less) in Japan years ago.
As to the Viking fighting, it's an interesting and very niche group I've discovered. HEMA is not a new sport and has a broad and eclectic set of historical doctrines it draws from. This group is interesting because, as has often been said, we know very little specific, concrete information about many things the Vikings did, as much of their history was rewritten by the incoming Christian culture, and what little remained was largely oral. We mainly have the Sagas and archaeology to go on to draw any real conclusions.
So the style was largely developed from these sources- study of the wound patterns of bodies known to have fallen in combat with Vikings (or Vikings fighting with each other), and deep reads of descriptions of battle in the Sagas as far as how someone held or utilized their weapons (we know, for example, that shields were used quite differently than mainland Europeans did several centuries later, etc.). Currently, we train with spear (two-handed), sword and shield, axe and shield, and seax. The founder would like to begin introducing aspects of Glima, the Viking unarmed style, as well, but currently the doctrine focuses on armed fighting.
Butting in again: a thing to consider regarding viking style fighting: battle, holmgång and a regular fight was very different things. (Yeah I now you know but it needs saying.)
Battle, well, then you are shoulder to shoulder with your chums in the scrum - hard to replicate in a safe and OHSA-approved manner.
Holmgång had rules - first blood, surrender and death. To violate any of them meant you would be declared wolf (not only outlaw but peaceless too).
Regular fights didn't have rules, unless it was an assault. A fight which both parties was equally guilty of starting was not counted as assault. There's an ancient idiom covering that: Han som sig i leken ger, ska leken tåla. He who enters the fray/game/fight, shall suffer it too.
One of the best sources on viking era laws are Gutalagen - law of the Gut (goths). It's the pre-christian laws of Gotland. When they became christian, they just added an extra "chapter zero" as a preamble to the actual laws. The actual first law states that all children are to be cared for, they may not be ut out. Haven't the foggiest where to find a translation if one even exists.
There are some Icelandic sources from the era as well (runic) detailing aspects of common law like the petition of grievances at an althing.
Yeah, our 11th century laws are the viking era laws plus Jesus written down. They're made up out of tingsmen's notes. Some of the detail the exact fine for exactly how much of a finger someone lost in a fight, if the bone was showing, how many shards of bone and how far from the boy they flew and so on - all to adjust the sum to be paid.
Braining someone so the actual brain could be seen was more expensive than outright killing him.
This is a big deal for our understanding of western European/New World culture when you consider how many things "English common law" is the basis for.
I am sorry. I feel your pain. I see all the closed schools all over the Portland area.
I was lucky enough to sell my practice when the mandates kicked in for health care workers. I didn't trust our state board to not allow exemptions. I was unemployed for 8 months. Managed to get myself to apply and landed a full time job with another doc, just 2 miles from my house. It was hard to work. I mean, what the hell for? What good is it? What good is the money I have saved? What will our future look like?
I was once a Korean martial arts school owner too. I left it and the ex who couldn't keep it in his pants, a long time ago. I miss it very much. I long for a tight group to workout with who are not part of the fucktards.
I struggle with the "what is it all for?" question constantly. It has helped a great deal to move to a home where our constant ongoing project is to achieve self-sufficiency, but even then, the question "but why even?" still pops up. It's why I hope Husbandmouth and I can get back onto the adoption process as I feel that continuity is one of the few things in life that is its own purpose.
But I have always been served well by one thing: if you have no other purpose in life, survive. If nothing else is happening, make survival your purpose. When nothing feels possible (whether or not that's true), your job is to make sure you're around for when possibility returns.
What good is it? We of martial discipline ( Hapki!) are the rock others may cling to. I have long told my students that " I don't train Fighters... I train The Light others will flock to in times of need"
You work to make the money to survive what's coming,my compatriot. You work to lift others above the tide of filth and degradation of duality they want to plunge our heads under.
You work to better yourself and those around you by your example. You ditched that dickhead because he wasn't Worthy of your light!
If needs be, flee the Portland area for a place ,perhaps away from the Cascadian fault lol, that you can find that tight group. That community.
In NE rural Georgia...we're not many...but we've read the tarot cards and they say:
" These fuckers are trying to run the board on the human race... we will not acquiesce to their goals"
Damn I appreciate that I can mouth-off freely here... lol
Love your “the Light others will flock to in time of need” thought. We all need that hope that our purpose is a noble one. I’m going with this premise from now on when I question my sanity and reason for being. Otherwise, I’ll be out in the streets at some point sending the fuckers to another dimension.
Please do- understand there is No One Way,and try to seevthrough the fog. Let them flock,be their examplar, then send them out in ever ranging circles. There is a time and place for everything. Do whatever you can to lift your own Beingness,before we get to the point where you start sending. A conscience must be clear that the actions were necessary.
We must maintain humanity,or it's not going to be a place we want hand down.
Thank you for the gentle chin lift. Probably need a kick in the ass though. ;) I am moving forward anyhow.
Encouragement is much appreciated.
I'm more likely to take a chunk outta your ass,but encouraging foot placement is also within my bulwark *evil grin*
You're in Healthcare ( what? No matter... even a coding specialist should be learning something that makes them valuable) and you're willing to draw on martial experience. You're willing to re-engage with others to recharge your experience.
You are an asset!
Me? I'm an ass,but one who deserves respect.
( here is where a " Yes,Ma'am!" would be appropriate)
Find your Place, AmKing. Find your Location. Find your peeps,even if it means moving to do so. You've skills...put them to use for You and Yours. Make sure that in the future ,Yours is a encompassing mantra.
Shijak!
Hopefully you also saw Pelosi elbow the little girl. She's really showing her true colors in her dotage.
I know this isn't an original thought, but I'm pretty sure- beyond joking- that she is actively drunk 99% of the time I see her on camera. I'm fairly sure there's some dementia starting to creep in, too.
As to the kind of person she is, I think she's been this way for a long, long time.
Welcome home. You have been sorely missed….
Thank you. It warms my heart to know it.
Most happy to hear from you again! As another reader said sometimes a quick don't think about it to much thought dump is just the thing.
Writing when you get depressed becomes one of those "email you haven't answered in a month" or "you should have called your mom" things where the longer it goes, the more impossible it feels.
The existence of the handful of paid subscribers were finally the impetus of "you owe it to some people to get off your ass" and at least lay down some tracks.
I'm glad you're feeling better. I actually enjoy the posts you just throw down right quick...
bingo on federalism
(i really should be sleeping)
Yeah, well, you saw when I wrote that, we all should have been sleeping. :)
Yahtzee!!.. oh, sorry...yeah...I dont have a bingo card
Welcome back.
Thank you very much.
Welcome back. And thank you.
You too, doc.
as a life long sufferer of depression i understand and offer the only thing that truly helped me, and that was going on a keto diet. it changes the gut bacteria and makes them happier, when they are happy they tell your brain to cheer up. it really works
I do well on keto and have been contemplating getting back to it lately.
yes me too, i need to clear the fridge out first tho, yum.
does wonders for weight loss too
It's tough because I do all the cooking for the family, and the guys are absolutely not interested in doing diets of any kind. The social aspect of food always makes diet tricky.
what i do is go full carnivore, i just eat the meat, fish, eggs and cheese. add some full fat cream to my coffee etc. my appetite suppresses and i can quickly reach the point where others food choices disgust me
That's the part I have to get to. I've had great results with keto before, I just have to get over the initial hump. The insomnia is seriously fucking up my appetite, though, so that has to get licked first, and I'm planning on quitting vapes when my current bottle is done. I know I can only disrupt my patterns so much at once.
yea motivation is tough when u dont give a fuck. i been meaning to get back into keto for a while, maybe we can motivate each other. reduce the crap food slowly daily/weekly a little less
Lots of small dishes maybe? Sort of smörgåsbord so people can pick and mix. Worked well when the wife and I lived in a collective and some were finnicky with their food. Don't want the honey-gazed chicken that's been marinating in ginger jucie over night? More for me! (cue all the man-boys round the table clamourng for getting the largest share left) Here, you can have my portion of the veggie casserole!
That kind of thing. 'Course, one needs the time to do the cooking. It's always logistics, isn't it?
Oh my dear GM, I realized this evening while reading your post how much I love your Substack/you. Even though funds are tight right now - as hubs and I prepare for the great famine and end of times die-off - I went ahead with an annual subscription. I figure that we’ll be able to enjoy the work of an excellent story-teller while we’re wasting away from starvation and radiation sickness.
Will be checking out the Canik Rival ASAP. Hubs thinks we need to expand the arsenal to protect homestead and our crazy, whiny, wimpy, pacifist liberal neighbors when the Chinese make land.
Thanks. You honor me.
My 2 cent advice on "the homestead arsenal." There's actually been a flurry of small arms evolution in the private sector in the past few years, and I've gotten to try things that have made me rethink some of my doctrine on what's worth buying for what purpose. Hopefully some of this is useful:
1) For straight, indoor, 'home invasion' defense, a .22 carbine like the Blue Line Global GSG. Yes, I'm serious. After playing with a few of these and seeing them perform, I'm a convert to .22 platforms for a couple reasons. They're light and accurate and the bullpup makes them intuitive for infrequent shooters (i.e., you can get pretty good with them pretty fast). The .22 round makes it very unlikely that through-and-through shots will hurt kids or pets and is less likely to shred your house. The round is very accurate at the range you're engaging a home invader. They're also VERY affordable, as is the ammo (not to mention .22 is abundant and available even right now). They have high-capacity magazines, which is what makes the .22 round workable for this role: you're not putting 1 shot in someone with a Ruger 10/22, you're rapidly striking the head and upper torso with probably more than 10 rounds, which will absolutely be lethal or incapacitating. The light weight makes them good for young shooters, too.
2) for civilian "shit hits the fan" homestead defense:
a) a tactical 12-gauge if you can handle the weight and recoil. Autoloaders have much better recoil than most pumps. Keep both slugs and shot on hand.
b) an AR platform you've handled and is comfortable. .223 ammo is more common, cheaper, and would be more available in a "battlefield scavenge" scenario, but .300 Blackout is a better round for the AR and most ARs these days offer platforms in both calibers.
c) another rifle in 7.62x39 like an AK-series. There are modern "AKAR" guns with AR uppers and AK lowers that let you enjoy the handling of AR rifles (and mount AR accessories) while shooting 7.62 and being able to use AK clips (depending on what you buy). These guns are heavier, as is the round and recoil, but 7.62 is widely available and is a very hard hitter (you're more likely to put someone down with one round than with a .223/5.56). The size and power also make a 7.62 rifle good as a dual-purpose for hunting game (I've used mine for deer/boar hunting for years).
d) pistols in 9mm or .40 cal. These are abundantly available and affordable calibers, allow for high-capacity magazines, and produce extremely manageable recoil even for people that aren't very strong or have lots of hours shooting. They require a lot of practice to be effective- shot placement matters a lot with smaller rounds like this.
If you've got one of each of those (maybe pistols for everyone), you're really as prepared as you can be.
But another big consideration for a real SHTF situation, especially for home, static, family defense, is body armor. It's completely legal for anyone without a felony conviction, anywhere in the US, to purchase body armor! Level 4, the highest grade, can (emphasis on CAN) stop assault rifle rounds. There are civilian retailers that sell vests/suits and plates (the things you slide into the clothing that actually do the protecting) at all levels, with designs for different body sizes, women's torsos, and kids. Body armor is expensive- level 4 sets can be over $500, and you have to replace the plates if they're ever hit- but they can save your life, and for families, they're a "one and done" purchase. Infidel Body Armor is a family-friendly brand.
Just some stuff to think about!
So glad to see you back. You have been missed.
Much appreciated.
You are missed. Reading your words are a bulwark to wanting to smother the living shit out of some folks. In some way, I suspect many of us feel we’ve been treading water for the last two years. Congrats on the new armament! Nothing like the feel of steel and the sound of pew pew pew.
We HAVE been treading water, and I think that's a big part of why so many of us feel so sick, tired, and resigned. Humans aren't designed to exist in hypervigilant, hyperaroused states for very long. It grinds us down hard.
At the same time, what the good fuck does 'moving on' feel like? Right now, it would feel like surrender. But what else are we waiting for?
They have fucked us up good, and they know it: it makes and keeps us off-balance, suggestible, and not thinking clearly.
The way forward needs to be some kind of reflection- on a very personal level- of "what can I realistically do as an individual," and then giving ourselves permission to enjoy life around that. This is made harder by the fact that many of us are REBUILDING lives to at least some extent at the same time.
But we have to believe in a future. We don't have to have faith that "everything will be okay," but we have to want to be here tomorrow.
Post when you post. These days, I am just glad that folks I follow are keeping on.
I read your take on Rachel and the DC Juggalos to the fam whilst on the road. They're in agreement but not happy about it. Truly hope you are mistaken.
I hope I am too, but the weird thing is, with this and all the other Big Things... I'm gradually getting to the point where I almost don't care HOW it turns out, I just want to KNOW, you know? Just cut the foreplay.
Waiting for the other shoe to drop? Oh yeah ..
I really enjoy your Molly Bloom-style train of consciousness.
Tiw, mumble grumble bloomin' joormans not being able to pronounce it right mumble grumble. Ah well, being lefthanded just like him makes me biased anyway. As I'm sure you know, Tyr put his right arm in the jaws of Fenris as security when putting the chain Gleipner on him, and when the chain choked him, Fenris bit the arm right off. There's a moral in there somewhere...
Depression sucks. I know that beast well, it put me in a bottle for four years straight, and if not for meeting my wife it'd have put me in the grave. But you know how to beat it.
Roe roe roe your wade... our media are having conniptions and joyful hysterics about it. Apparently according to pundits in state media, A handmaid's Tale is a documentary about present day US. And for this I must pay tax? I mean, as I understand US liberals and whatnots think we here in Europe have unlimited and unregulated abortions? Well, about that: week 12, that's pretty much it here. Later than that and you need to get it approved for medical reasons.
Viking martial arts? Must be glima.
Leather anniversary... if ever there was a term ledning itself to innuendo!
And that bit about Albuquerque and Rachel and so on had me guffawing for real - I could somehow see the whole scene in the mind's theater.
That bit with having trouble keeping female friends, that's virtually ubiquitous for all strong women with backbone, grit and integrity. That's no flaw or anything like that - it's the opposite!
Hey, I'm a lefty too!
The left hand is the right hand! Ave Ordo Sinister! ;)